The Kissing Game: Taking Turns at the Lead

If you’d like to spend a great 30 minutes with your lover get out a timer and share this Kissing Game. Often just the man (less often the woman) leads the kissing show and things can get predictable. Here’s a way to trade off the lead in order to stir the pot for adventure.

The idea of the Kissing Game is to stay true to yourself while kissing your partner. You both practice doing it your way which tells your partner information about your turn-ons. For 10 minutes each you will take turns being active and passive, or kisser and kissee. When you only have one thing to do, you can do it better—rather it’s being in charge or letting it go. Simplicity can increase our interest and pleasure.

Taking turns also gives each partner the chance to lead or design the show. Often the woman lets the man lead because traditionally she sees her role as responding in sex. She may become bored with kissing and not know why. (Most likely if one partner is bored the other is too.) She may not know that becoming the active role, or kisser, will spice up the show. Of course the man needs to be able to relax into the “kissee”, being-done-to role, and then presto! Most men love it when a woman takes charge, and there’s nothing sexier than a woman taking her own pleasure

When you are the kissee (receiving the kisses), set the timer for ten minutes, make yourself comfortable, offer a slightly open mouth for the kisser’s exploration, and do not react by moving. Close your eyes and tune in to your sensations. Breathe. When you are the kisser (giving the kisses), kiss only the face and neck without touching the rest of the body, and find new ways to explore the sensations of your mouth and tongue for your pleasure.

Kissing tips: Discovery by tongue is a tender, playful journey. Start out slowly and leisurely with your kissing. How lightly can you kiss? With a relaxed, soft mouth, graze over her cheeks, hair line, and facial features by barely touching the skin. Trace the eyebrows with soft lips or tongue. Tenderly kiss the tip of the nose, the corners of the lips, and the contour of the ear. The mouth is so sensitive that less is more. Your attitude is inquisitive—playing a new game with each kiss. Once you reach the mouth, kiss lightly without your tongue at first. Hard and wet mouth mauling misses the point.

Decide active/passive roles first, take a breath mint, and set the timer for ten minutes. End with a heart salutation, with your hands in prayer position at your heart and bow in gratitude for heartfelt kisses.  Set the timer for two minutes and Kissee tells kisser what s/he liked best about the kisses. Listen well, this is great information to become a better lover. Switch roles for another ten minutes of heaven. Again take two minutes to tell your partner what you liked best about her/his kisses.